Two years ago, today.

Brokenness.

Regardless of what's broken, a heart or a bone-the treatment is still the same. Brokenness needs time to heal, and often a cast of protection around the wound to insure healing without interference.

This day, 2 years ago, I stood on the edge of the Florida coastline- in complete shock and disbelief. I was scared beyond words. Exhausted. Confused. Devastated. Broken.

Hours previously my divorce was finalized; the judge signed his name, stamped my papers and said "next" to signal in the next lawyer/client. I remember standing there thinking,

"That's it? I shaved my legs for this?"

Honestly, as I went to the beach that afternoon, I thought I would feel a sense of relief. But instead, I was sick and numb. So I did what I do- I ran.

And so this morning, 2 years later, I finally feel that sense of relief and thankfully I am no longer sick and numb! But I still did what I do- I ran (although today it was a walk/jog- speaking of broken! blah). As I did I was reminded of what is required to go from brokenness to wholeness. And though its been two years since my divorce, I'm here to tell you....this takes more time than you think! Relief didn't come that first day, or the next month, or a year later. That kind of brokenness will not fully heal by running to the next thing, it has to be repaired- and that requires time, protection, and some hard work!

And just as my ankle this morning reminded me that its still not 100%, my heart does the same from time to time. Every now and again, I still sense the damage of my failed marriage. I'm still re-wiring the lies I believed and learning to redefine my life! And this- girlfriends, IS worth shaving your legs for!!

Dear friends, for those of you who have a story similar to mine....hang on! You will make it through! But if I could say one thing that I promise to be true: you will sell yourself short if you jump the gun and not allow plenty of time to recover and heal! Do not allow yourself to believe the lie that what you need to do is "move on"! Nothing could be farther from the truth....we (hearts) need to heal up NOT move on!!

You will not regret the time spent re-wiring your hard drive....but you will deeply regret what happens when you don't!!

For those of you who are new to this blog....here's my day 2 years ago when I danced on the coastline! It wasn't written/posted until May because I needed time to process the emotions.

I'm currently reading a book-"The Emotionally Destructive Relationship" by Leslie Vernick and there is a quote at the end of the book that I love. It reads:

The legacy I'd like to leave behind

Is that I've helped one life at a time

Beginning with mine.

-Donna Upson