Thursday, January 29, 2009

Declaration. This is it.

**update...if you are just now reading this...you will need to click onto this song "Declaration" on the music bar to hear it...It was a little much for background music on the newer posts!!**

Do you have a "song"?? You know "your song"? The song that speaks exactly of your present moments? And you just can't stop playing it?? Here's mine!

*Warning: if you are older than 50...ahem...Mom, Dad, Granny and Grandma...you might want to turn down your volume a tad. This might not be your "favorite" kind of music! *smiles*

For the rest of you...the kids and I are finding that this is 'way' fun to be silly and dance to, with pretend microphones of course! You gotta let loose and have some fun...maybe pull the curtains however!! I promise you'll feel better afterwards...and the kids will never want to stop!!

Declaration (this is it!) by Kirk Franklin:

Check it out, ya'll
(There've been times in my life)
I'm tired and I wanna give up
(I've been wondering why)
Why is the world gettin' so crazy?
(Still, somehow I believe)
I've come too far to die now
(I always survive)
If you're a survivor, get up!Let's get it!

Gonna cry now, go ahead and get it out of my system
I know I hurt now, but soon I gotta get back to livin'
Can't be here next year, givin' you these same tears
I hope you enjoyed it, 'cause it's the last time you will take a piece of me

I start right now, I don't know how I'm gonna get thru it
I know right now, I pray somehow 'cause I can't do it
I can't keep livin' like this, there's gotta be more than this
Jesus, I'm ready, I'm ready for what you have for me

Chorus
(Are you gonna wait for a sign?)
Are you ready for you're miracle
God's people it's time to'(stand up and fight)
Let's get it, let's get it'
This is it!!
You can't mess with my mind anymore'
This is it!
I'm smarter, see I've been here before'
This is it!
It's time today, I'm not afraid anymore'
This is it!
Yes, I believe, if you believe, help me say'
This is it!
I'm a child of the King baby, look at somebody and tell 'em'
This is it!

I look back now, I look at how you tried to break me
To take my life, my peace of mind and drive me crazy
My self esteem, my dreams, my destiny
So, God allowed it, because He knew He had big plans for me
(Hallelujah!)
It's your grace, I know today it's how I made it (Thank You, Jesus)
When I thought that it was over' (Lord, have mercy)

Chorus
Everybody that's been holdin' you down, look at 'em and tell 'em'
This is it!
I feel my help coming on right now, ya'all'
You think that maybe it's over'(You're life ain't over)
Not unless you want it to be(Are you gonna wait for a sign?)
you're miracle(stand up and fight)

Rap
This is it ya'll, this is it ya'all
You've been waitin' and debating , here it is, ya'll
All your stuff from your past, shake it off ya'll
Though they said you wouldn't last, but who is ya'll?
Want your dreams back?
Let's get it!
Your peace of mind back?
Let's get it!
Want your family back?
Let's get it!
Are you ready? Let's get it! (This is it!)
I speak against everything that comes to destroy the purpose in your life'
This is it!
Worrying about your finances, your future, when you can't even sleep at night'
This is it!
I speak against depression and fear, every attack from the enemy'
This is it!
This is your day, the Lord made it baby!
God has set you free!'
This is it!
You can't mess with my mind anymore'
This is it!
I'm smarter, see I've been here before'
This is it!
It's time today, I'm not afraid anymore'
This is it!
I wanna hear ya'll sing this with your boy!
Every body say' This is it!
You can't mess with my mind anymore'
This is it!
I'm smarter, see I've been here before'
This is it!
It's time today, I'm not afraid anymore'
This is it!
Yes, I believe, if you believe, help me say'
This is it!

Lately I've been blasting this song from my ipod while running! I just can't get enough of it! My next favorite song is the next one on the blog playlist...Jesus! I've listened to Kirk Franklin for many years...somehow his songs are so true for me and the energy of them are very uplifting!! And when I say I've been blasting them from my ipod, I mean over and over again...for 7 miles!!

So, I thought I would share them with you!

Let me see those pretend microphones...I know you got them too!!

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Noses.

Just a few more pictures...But, I'm sorting my thoughts on another post, stay tuned if you are interested...it takes time right now to clear out the "me" and just get to the "God" part of my life!
Madelyn is changing so fast right now...she now wants to feed herself! This is NOT one of my favorite stages! Let me repeat...NOT! I don't like yogurt on every blessed thing! Hair, ears, fingers, clothes and all over the chairs!! Oh the mess! Sam I am. Did that just sound like I've been reading too many Dr. Seuss books...maybe.




Also cute these days, Madelyn and Dakota playing "noses". I"m sure Dakota would LOVE for his 5th grade class to know that he plays "noses" with his baby sister! But it is cute!! She adores him and it makes my heart jump to see him kiss her goodbye in the morning!




My sister gave Madelyn these cute hat, mittens and scarf set for Christmas! Too funny...Maddie was fine until the scarf went on...she sorta froze and wasn't sure if she could move!! But the pom-poms on the hat and scarf were adorable to see bouncing around the yard!!




And for those of you who don't have 3 boys and a girl...who might wonder what Madelyn and I have to deal with on a daily basis...here's a glimpse! I'd love to say that they were just acting this way for the video. I'd be lying!! She is saying "HIII" at the end...passy talk!!

Monday, January 19, 2009

That's my girl!!

Yes, she's only 18 months...but she's driving!! I'm totally impressed with her ability to maneuver this 4wheeler, the boys weren't doing this at 18 months! Go girl!! We are however having a few issues with the looking backwards while driving forwards concept! But then again...the boys STILL do that! It cracks me up to see Madelyn out there driving around, all grown up like...sucking on her passy!! Priceless.

Saturday, January 17, 2009

The sweet sound of laughter!



The laughter in my house last night was wonderful...Andre to the rescue!! For some reason he discovered that he can move his eyebrows independently!! At least he can do something with those "Latino eyebrows", cause there's a bunch of them!! They proved to be entertaining and wonderful fun for the evening!! Just had to share it with you!!


(you might need to pause the music inorder to hear the video...the visual is entertaining enough however!)

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Tearful sowing

Sorry to those who like more kid pictures...I have none.
But for me who needs to process...maybe who needs to voice what is coming into focus, here is the place. I share myself here only because I need to, I feel led to, and I want to give my children insight into things that I might not remember to tell them one day. A place that they can someday see more deeply how the Lord has changed my life and theirs. How perfectly He has walked us through the deepest of waters, but yet by His hand, there was dry ground to travel on. My story is also theirs, so I tread carefully with few details of life...but I want to share the Lords lessons. How He uses The Word to change me, to direct and focus my eyes.

In Psalms 126:5-6 it says:
Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy.
He who goes out weeping, carrying seed to sow, will return with songs of joy, carrying sheaves with him.

I can't say that these verses would have stood out to me had I not had my handy-dandy Bible commentary that I absolutely love (have I said that before?? everyone needs one!!). But after reading the commentary...it became crystal clear and I see myself in every word.

The picture is this:
The Jewish people who had been exiled from Israel were allowed back into their home land. They had few valuables and the land there was barren. No growth, no quick means in which to live off the land. So the first years would be challenging...it would take time to cultivate the land and a season of waiting as the harvest needed time to grow. (clearly no Walmart in sight!!)

The verse is painting the picture of the harvester. The farmer who is sowing his seeds. There is a choice in his situation...he can choose to eat all the grain now, or eat a small amount and sow the rest to insure an abundant harvest later. Can you see this man, maybe the woman even...out in the barren field, with only an "apron full" of grain to their name? Can you imagine the tears that must have run down their faces as they dropped each piece of grain through their fingertips into the ground, realizing this is food that will not be on the table today...their kids will still be hungry and their tummies might growl in hunger tonight? None of us want to take things away from our children, to see them suffer. The choice is tough...but clear. The farmer knows that the seeds will grow and the harvest will be needed for food later. There is a "death" of sorts in this, maybe some grieving involved...the painful sacrifice today for the sake of the future.

I can just picture in my mind the farmer out there alone, walking row by row...face wet from the tears but a heart obedient in faith as he prays "Lord, bless this sacrifice. I do so in faith that You will provide". I can feel the heavy heart of the farmer as the last piece is dropped. I can see the apron empty but heavily soaked from emotion.

This picture burns inside me, makes me wonder about my own apron.
No surprise here...my apron is soaked.

But there's a tough question to be asked: are we eating our seeds, or sowing them?

Which am I?
You?

My new challenge this year is for Bible memorizing. There is Power in this book, and I need it today and for tomorrow. I'm choosing to think of this as one way to "sow my seeds".

For me in general, its tearful sowing time, life is hard right now...but I hold on to the truth that tearful sowing will yield songs of joy!!

I'm preparing myself for the sheaves...the blessings that are too many to count. For I will sing songs of joy!

My verses for the month:
**Isaiah 58:11**
"I will guide you always. I will satisfy your needs in a sun scorched land. I will strengthen your frame."

**Psalms 130:7
"O Israel, put your hope in the Lord, for with the Lord is unfailing love and with him is full redemption."

Sunday, January 11, 2009

The run of familiarity

Yesterday I did my 7 mile run (per my training schedule for the upcoming marathon). Before I left the house I had a route planned out...I was going to travel for 4 miles down a new path in town and then come back. Clearly that would put me over 7 miles, but hey who's counting? I thought that even though this part of the trail was newer and parts of it I had been on once or twice before, I hadn't been on the newest extended part and figured it would be interesting to see about it. Whew, did that make sense?

I strapped on my shoes and knee braces, got my ipod situated, grabbed my sunglasses and was out the door. I pushed "play" and was on my way, ready to simply put one foot in front of the other. I guess I also "checked out" for a few. About 7 minutes later I realized I had taken a wrong turn from what I had originally planned for the day. I had taken a left, heading straight toward my normal 3 mile loop that I run twice a week! Once I realized that there were a few minutes there that I don't remember, I started to worry about the 7 mile thing...why would I have gone this way, how am I gunna get 7 miles out of this 3 mile loop?

It wasn't long until this blog came to mind...this post specifically. To be more specific...the title. I realized that more than a new trail, the interest of seeing new things and being somewhere different...what I really needed was familiarity. At this time in my life, everything is new. I'm experiencing things I never knew about, thought about or felt. I'm nervous. I'm emotional. I'm struggling to just keep things predictable. Some runs are incredibly fun because they are a new adventure and the scenery is fresh. On Saturday, I needed familiar. I needed the predictability of the ground, the sounds, the sights. I would know exactly how far I had gone, and how much farther I needed to go. I know each mile and can almost run it in my sleep! Nothing new. Nothing different to experience. I've had enough of that for the week.

As I ran along my familiar path, everything was as it had been the day before, the week before and how it was last year. Same trees, same houses, same people walking the roads. It was a relief really. The run of familiarity was perfect.

Of course, it reminded me of the wonderful love of the Lord. His heart that never changes. His love that doesn't give up and His promises that He always delivers on! Oh how I love the pedictablility of that. He can be counted on because He is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow!

Oh and another thing...one other thing that can be counted on...my kids will not always be thrilled with this...matching Christmas jammies! But while they are...I'm all over it!!

Monday, January 5, 2009

School. No? Not today??

What??
How did I not get this right??
I thought for sure today was when school started!

Everyone was in bed early last night, and me too! Dakota got himself up at 6:15am this morning and showered, I got the boys up and dressed...almost dancing and singing as I did so! Hurray...school starts today!! I was all smiles!! And so were they!
We piled into the car at 8am so I could start the morning routine...Dakota to school at 8 for safety patrol, run Andre over to his 1/2 day day-care, take Ramiro back over to the school and lug him and Madelyn into Ramiro's class...however none of that ever happened.
Oh no, none of it but the pulling out at 8am all dressed, back packs ready and lunch money sorted! We get to the school (I still full of smiles) and I gasped as I looked around and saw nothing but teachers cars parked on the main road!

Where are the school buses? Parents?
Where are all the other "smiling" parents?
Where. are. the. other. parents.
I want to see kids...lots of kids, with cute backpacks and new Christmas clothes on!
(groaning starts and my smiles are turning to tears)
I need today off...some peace and quite! Some time to just get my house put back together...alone with Madelyn!!
School must start today, it just has to. I even checked it before the holidays and wrote it on my calender!
Somehow I missed the memo.
Ramiro started melt down mode immediately...I considered it too! He recovered some 2 hours later.
No school until tomorrow and so I had to take 3 kids begrudgingly to Walmart to get some groceries! Oh Lord help me...

So far, no one's injured...well barely...Madelyn did have a small mishap onto the floor from the buggy...small heart attack, she survived!
At the moment...the little boys are NOT SLEEPING! The "don't feel tired today"! I'm about to explain to them NICELY of course, about TIRED!! I need a moment...or 30...please boys...sleep!!

Thursday, January 1, 2009

The First

Yahoo...January 1, 2009!
Somedays I thought it would never come...other days it seemed so close! Never-the-less, it's here now!
As I watch my kids grow...I feel sure these holidays come faster and faster every year!

I will post some pics from our Alabama trip...later...we had a great time!

I ran my 23 miles on Saturday and did great! It was a hoot b/c my sister rode a bicycle and had 2 of her friends join us for some of the time also! I had drink bottles handed to me, PB&J sandwich handoffs, and rice balls! My sister carried everything in her backpack so I didn't have to run with it...we forgot the camera...I'm mad b/c it was quite the sight to see!! The last 2 miles were a struggle...Carrie had to come up with some interesting stories of her massage clients to keep me from whining too much...but we did it!! Thank you, Thank you, Thank you Carrie!! And Kristen and Amanda too!! And to my family who watched 4 crazy kids while I was running. Oh and btw...would you believe that I did it in 3 1/2 hours!! Oh yes baby...I was cruzin!!

So today I will go on my first run for 2009. I will also start a Bible memorizing challenge with Beth Moore and Living Proof Ministries...a first for me!! Love that lady! First thing this morning I mapped out how to finish paying of our credit card in 3 months!! Big Yahoo!! And also today I will clean like a crazy woman...I like a clean house first and foremost!!

Beth Moore says that she's sure that this is going to be a Jesus year! For me, I know that it has to be...the year that God teaches me, leads me and grows me up in Him! As I listened to the fireworks last night (I was in bed, I know...bbbooorrring), as I thought about everyone celebrating the new year...I smiled and rested my head peacefully on my pillow...I'm celebrating too! Maybe not really over 2009...but what God has brought me through to get me to 2009! I had my own fireworks of thanksgiving!!

**update**...I had to come back and add this. I calculated my miles (yes, I keep good records of every run) ran in the year 2008...drum roll please...537.7 miles!! Another first!!