When I run, I will most certainly attend the get together that I was invited to but felt too busy for. When I run, I plan to go straight home and immediately pay all the currently due bills. When I run, I know that an extra 30 minutes will be like Heaven...I will have plenty of energy for that and more! When I run, I rehearse how I will say "NO" to everything that I am not "called" to do but am still doing. When I run, I plan wonderfully healthy meals for my children...knowing that they will love all the veggies and thank me for the yummy dinner. When I run, I commit to cleaning out the pantry, reorganizing the linen closet and clearing out the past weeks worth of "out-grown clothes" in the kids rooms. Oh and then bag them...labeling appropriately for charity...getting out the next sizes and assuring that they are neatly placed in the correct drawer for them to easily find! Whew! When I run, I reorganize the budget to give more and waste less. When I run, I plan to never say unkind words about anyone. I will only allow uplifting and encouraging words leave my lips. When I run, the world is full of opportunities and "green lights". When I run, I promise to keep my house spotless, floors mopped, laundry complete and all moldy,green fuzzy food out of my fridge. When I run, I vow to find more time to be still before the Lord. When I run, I will always praise my children's accomplishments and understand their need to "test boundaries".
When my run has ended and my feet have come to a halt...I somehow face the reality of the "red lights", the attitudes of "do I have to eat this?? Its gross", the loss for words when I'm faced with another responsibility, the lack of energy and desire to clean out the kids clothes, and think that green fuzz in the fridge would be helpful for next years 5th grade science project! Oh ya, and certainly the Lord knows I need my rest! My other self has resurfaced and is back. The Jill that makes it moment to moment. The mother that begins to fume over a certain child (who is blond, 4 and looks just like his mother...ahem) that must always have his way! Where did the "running Jill" go? Can't she stay a little longer?? Doesn't she know that we need her here at this house?? Maybe she's only to be found out on the roads. Its an interesting phenomena that the simple act of feet to pavement allows the "day to day Jill" to fade away, soon to be replaced by the one I really want to be.
My truest desire is to one day find that the "running Jill" and the "day to day Jill" have decided to merge. They have joined forces and become one! Until then, I will continue to strengthen the Jill in running shorts and pray for the Jill at home! Endorphins are a wonderful thing!
No comments:
Post a Comment