Pics I've promised my family!

Dakota is thinking that Heaven might look something like this...a skate park! Though I felt that I should have taken advantage of the "teachable" moment...I let it go. It was spoken like a 10 year old, the innocence of a child who loves to play and skateboard.

Dan took the boys here last weekend...they had a blast.

Dakota was thrilled to practice some tricks...less thrilled with the end results from a few of them! But, here's one that was maybe successful.

Ramiro never ceases to amaze me...how the 5 year old keeps his body in balance like this is incredible. I suppose if you have very little fear of falling/pain...the potential of that freedom is huge! So...off he goes...full force, as fast as he can...and amazingly successful!

Dakota did awesome in that he was able to overcome the half-pipe! Its intimidating to start at the top, hard to keep balanced and keep up with the speed. He really has a gift for sports!!



And then there's Andre...not so much into the speed of skateboarding. Happy to ride his bike around, stopping to smell the flowers along the way. But, he loves to be out there with the boys and on the look out for a "hairplane" or "helocofter" in the sky!! Gotta love it!!

Here's Maddie...its tough to be the baby of a runner sometimes! Especially when its cold and mommy has a run to get in!

Don't let her pitiful eyes fool you...

...she doesn't last long...she gets some ZZZ's in along the way!!

My leaves of Thanksgivings.

I am excited to write today.
Thankful that even through trials, there is joy and Thanksgiving.
Humbled that God would choose me this morning.

I got up to go running this morning, though at first not really thrilled about it.
It was 40 something outside and I haven't had much sleep lately (this time due to a baby that is not feeling well).
However I forced myself up because I had this unusual desire to see what was new this morning.
The run wasn't so interesting in and of itself...but as I was headed home, a tender moment was waiting for me.

As I have run the past many weeks, I have noticed the many interesting leaves on the ground. The many shapes and colors have been too numerous to count. I would run from leaf to leaf thinking "oh, that one is my favorite...oh wait, no THIS one is my favorite". On and on I would go, finding my favorite shapes and colors.

I had decided that I would gather a few of them on my way home this morning to use as name markers for my Thanksgiving table. Every person would have their name on a card (I know, so Martha Stewart-ish of me...but I just can't help myself!!) that would then be setting on the leaf that I had placed on their plates/napkins.

I wanted to make sure to have at least one for each person, so as I was heading home I picked out my "favorites"... one for Dan, found a good one for Dakota, another for Ramiro, one for Andre and a cute smaller one for Madelyn.

As I was searching among the leaves, some I found under a bush, another one came from around the tree across the lawn, some were in plain sight just sitting on the grass...I wanted to savor the moment of collecting my Thanksgivings. I have much to be thankful for and if I were to gather a leaf for every blessing I have had, I would need some help getting them all home. Some of my blessings come to mind immediately, they are out in plain sight. But others, I have to think a bit harder about. I must search my heart a little more, looking for the blessing that may be hiding behind the bushes in life. Never-the-less, they are there and I find joy in knowing that my life has "blessingS". Plural.

Once I was satisfied with my bundle of leaves, I continued on home. I wondered what people were thinking when they saw my arms full of dried leaves. I'm sure it never crossed their mind that these were representing my "Thanksgivings" and furthermore, that I would be somehow using them as decorations on a table with food.

I stopped suddenly when I noticed that in the center of the sidewalk there was this one leaf, laying there all alone, in the shape of a perfect heart. As I bent down to pick it up, the emotional flood gates flew wide open. For I had forgotten the most important thing of all...the blessing I have in knowing my Lord and Savior. And knowing Him in a way this year like never before. This year, I understand the "unfailing love" of the Lord differently. His love that keeps my heart beating, though bruised and tattered. His voice that gently speaks to my soul. His fullness that is all I need. His heart that has changed mine.

I placed the heart leaf on the top of my pile, wrapped my arms around the sweet moments I was holding, wiped my eyes and headed home.

As I walked into my house, the sounds of my "blessings" already in full roar...I was glad to have my arms filled to the brim. Full of my blessings that I will display this year, my leaves of Thanksgivings. Plural.

Unbehaving

Andre today had something profound to say.
"Mom, you might need to bring the paddle that Papa made...I might end up unbehaving".

I tried with everything I had to take him seriously.
If you knew the story about my father making me a special "paddle" you would maybe appreciate it more, but how funny is that? It was almost like "unbehaving" just pops up from no where and suddenly takes over!! We must be prepared!!

Too funny...I didn't want to forget it...I wish I could have captured the look on his face too!
Priceless.

No doubt, they're related

Sometimes I just can't get over how the gene pool works. But interestingly
enough...Andre's hair is getting incredibly curly...humm...only on top however. He might truly be half me and half his father! And what do you do with hair like that...completely straight on the side and back...big and curly on top!!??
Well, we cut it all off yesterday. It looks nice...I'm missing the curls though...thankfully I'm confident that they will grow back!

The not so 17 miles

17 miles.
That was the goal. The plan.
I had my backpack all packed...2 containers filled with fluid, skittles, gummy bears, nuts, 2 granola bars, powerbar, B12 Hot Shot pill, trail mix, my favorite Burts Bee chapstick (never leave home without it), and last but not least, a tub of Vaseline (I'll explain later, but think "wet skin rubbing for 3 hours"). Oh yes, cell phone, ipod and pepper spray too! Not that I would have been able to get to the pepper spray before being someone's lunch...but you know, just in case!

I had eaten 2 hours earlier, while it was raining outside. Drank fluids, taken my enzymes like a good girl and a shot of coffee.

The first 9 miles were great. Zero pain. Plenty of energy. Good company (thanks Cathy for the 3 miles of distraction)! And was making good time.

It was short lived.

Mile 10...exhaustion hit.
It was HOT and muggy outside, I felt my skin burning and I was out of fluids. I was out on the part of the trail that has zero entertainment (except for a few heart attacks from snakes). No shade either. Just me, the heat, my pack of food that wasn't setting well on my stomach and no water! I had another 7 miles to go. So, I began to walk more. Trying to conserve myself. I had hardly eaten my food...my stomach wasn't happy over the trail mix and almonds that I had eaten early in the run, and I was starting to get goose bumps. I knew this was dehydration.

I was flat out of energy...although not in any pain what so ever (one small miracle)...just absolutely too hot and much too exhausted.

I had taken my B12 pill, it was starting to kick in around mile 13...I was able to run some more and I got to some shady parts of the trail. I called home just before mile 16..."meet me at the street-ice water-lots of it-3 minutes". Dakota was out there with 2 huge containers of ice water and a cute smile!! Oh it was the best water I've ever had. I had decided to walk the last 2 miles (miles 16 and 17)...but only made it through the first. I had to get home. My head felt odd (at least more so than usual, hee hee) and I was beginning to feel unsure of my legs...never a comforting sign.

I made it in the door, in the shower and to the couch. My stomach by this point was NOT OK and I was needing sleep. I rested for awhile, got something on my stomach and began recovering slowly.

By the evening, I felt much better and was trying to make sense of what happened. I think it was a combination of a few things. Since I am still of "child bearing years" (catch my drift?), haven't slept well lately, and wasn't prepared for the sun/heat...I think it was just a tall order for the day.

And note to self, next time...no almonds!!

So, 16 miles it was. 3 hours and 15 minutes.
I was disappointed at first.
Today however, I feel great.
Hardly sore, knees feel fine and I know that in 3 weeks...I'll be better prepared for the next "tall" order.... 20 miles!

Wish me luck...

He. Is. Persistent.

Do you know 1 Corinthians 15:51?
Here it is:
"Listen, I tell you a mystery: We will not all sleep, but we will all be changed".

What mystery is in that??
Let me help Paul out.
Jill.
Lacking in sleep.
Change is guaranteed.
There. Mystery solved.

Somehow, I sense a slight "sense of humor" in Pauls comment there. And actually, I'm not finding it particularly funny. :)

Why is it that God wants to say something to me at 5am?? What about 5pm?? How about noon?? I've had coffee by that point, my humor is better, I'm not yawning. And certainly my ability to understand and process information is better than at 5 am!! What could be said/understood in 15 minutes is taking an hour!! For "Heaven sakes" (hee hee) I need some more rest!! Can these meetings be re adjourned?? At a more convenient time??

But, if I could say one thing right now about the "ways of the Lord" in my life, it would be "persistence"!

5am...every morning, persistence!!

Actually, I've seen this verse written on cards to new parents "We will not all sleep, but we will all be changed". Seems appropriate...maybe even a tad funny, in that case.

The past many days have been tiring...lots of emotions, sadness for friends, managing the fights between my boys...this referee is tired! Oh and I have 17 miles to run tomorrow!!

But God is persistent and He is bringing about change in me. I see it, I feel it and know its for the better. I just have an opinion on the time of day He is choosing. So much for my opinions, huh?? It wouldn't be the first, nor the last, I'm afraid!!

Today, this is my prayer "Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me." Psalm 52:12.

Maybe God already knew I would need this...therefore He has chosen the wee hours of the morning to "restore joy"!

Even through the yawning...I am thankful that He is faithful...and, alright...if I must say it...persistent too!
As I went to go steal a cooking today...I found this in the cookie container, left by my oldest son. I had to capture the moment...saving it forever...the heart of a child, thinking beyond himself! Speaking of restoring joy....

Comfort for a mother **updated**

**update...at bottom of this post**

Today, just this afternoon, a 16 year old body was laid to rest.
But most importantly, last Thursday, November 6, 2008..."Megan" went to be with her Redeemer.

As I watched Linda today...still in a state of shock, burying her only child...I couldn't feel peaceful about the role of a "mother" today. This is just not something a mother should have to do...it seems so unfair at this hour. I must be honest and say that it rattles the "mother" in me a tad...ok...a lot.

The service was very nice, such thoughtful words spoken and sang. The music was peaceful and the Gospel was shared.

As I've come home...flipping from blogspot to blogspot, looking for something of comfort (I did stop by CVS for some Skinny Cow ice cream sandwiches...they did help some...all 2 of them!!)...I am reminded that comfort, real "COMFORT", is not found here! I've done this before, and I've come up short every time. Real comfort...the lasting kind, the only true kind, is from the Lord.

So, that is where I will go.
To find hope for the future, strength for the weary, and healing for a hurting heart.
For I know this to be true...we can not give what we do not have!

As we continue to walk with Linda, helping to carry some of the load...I know that we can be a mirror, a reflection of Gods love for her!

*******************
I just had to add this later this evening.
So, I got thinking about "comforts" and just had to come back here for one last thing...I am a person who loves her comforts. And as I was cooking this evening...I realized just how many comforts we really do gravitate towards, maybe without even thinking about it. Yes, the Lord is really the only true comfort...but don't we all have a favorite pair of slippers that just helps us to relax??

I realized that I had gone into my room and covered myself from head to toe with these wonderful "feel good" things. First on the list, my lavender knitted/zipper/hoodie sweater thing...oh its soft and fits me perfectly. Then my velour, olive green pants that are a tad too long in order to keep my ankles warm! Next, my newest "comfort" addition...LLBean scuff slippers ( in chocolate color). Also, anyone love the Burts Bees Replenishing Lip Balm with pomegranate oil?? Gotta have it!! I use it all day long and its a must have! Burts Bees also has a wonderful hand balm that I crave!! This ensemble must be topped off with my wrap-around-the-neck-thing-a-ma-bob that is filled with something that smells wonderful when you heat it up in the microwave (some aromatherapy stress thing)...I think it really works!! Whew!! Talk about comfort, I'm set! Oh ya...maybe some decaf coffee with Gingerbread creamer!!

What are some of ya'lls comfort techniques??
I'm off to heat up my "thing-a-ma-bob" and snuggle with my other comforts...my kids!!

How fast life changes

Our church family has once again this week been given the opportunity to practice what we preach...loving people in the midst of great trials...and once again a death in our church family.

This sweet girl, Megan, passed away last night in a tragic car accident. Her mother, Linda, is an active member of our church (she teaches my children every Sunday) and is desperately needing our prayers this evening! This was a photo I took of Megan when we gave her our dog, Jasmine, almost 2 years ago! Jasmine was needing a home with fewer kids and Megan was needing some puppy love!! It was a perfect fit!

I had just hugged her neck (Meagan's) Friday night at our fall festival at church...and tonight I just can't grasp how fast life can change.

For my friends and family who live out of town...and read this blog...clearly you do not know this family...please be in prayer for this single woman, Linda. I simply can not imagine the depth of her loss and what she will face in the days ahead.

Lord, please teach us to love as you do...to serve as you would have us serve. As these next few days are sure to bring much pain and sadness for Linda and our church family, allow us to be a reflection of you.

The Fiery Furnace

So here we are...the "morning after" as some call it.
History is made.
My heart raced all evening (last night) and still again this morning...I needed some reassurance and I knew God needed to speak to me.
I could feel it with every racing beat of my heart.
I didn't sleep well. I felt wide awake at 2am, 4am, 5:30am.

Finally around 10:30 this morning...I sat down to deal with this feeling. The best way I could explain it to you is this, I feel this: "mtopouotiyakestngyitr". And then after some time in silence, some reflection on God's word...it becomes clear..."I'm trying to speak to you" suddenly comes from the jumble. The letters are the same...the message just needs Gods divine power to make it clear and give peace! Hope I didn't loose you with that...hang on...I still want to tell you what God is teaching me this morning.

So, I sat down this morning...and this is what fell on my heart!
Daniel 3
It's the story of King Nebuchadnezzar (I will not torture myself with that spelling any further and just call him N for short!!). You may know it. If not...here's the scoop, very watered down.

King N had made an idol and commanded the people to bow down and worship when they heard the trumpets sound. Three men...Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego refused. For they knew that God had said "You shall not make for yourself an idol...You shall not bow down to them or worship them" (Exodus 20:4-5). Some spies told on them therefore King N ordered that they be thrown into a "fiery furnace". One point of interest here...this was no campfire. This was a fire that was ordered to be heated seven times hotter than the usual temperature. The stakes were higher than normal...this is capturing my attention on this specific day in history. Matter of fact...the men who threw them into the fire were killed from the intensity of the flame! Important...the stakes are high!! Don't we know that to be true this morning??

As King N came to look into the furnace...he saw four men...the 3 mentioned but a fourth whose "form was like the Son of God" (NKJV). King N clearly knew who this was. Immediately I felt something new...God is not hiding!! He is with us in the heat!! I opened a Bible commentary of mine (love it!!) and this is what it said... "The Lord either saves us out of troubles or He is with us in the troubles."!! I wanted to jump up and down and sing for joy!! The King N saw 4 men...God was there, with them IN the fire!! No He didn't save them from being in the fire, but He had a plan...a perfect plan!

The other thing I want to note here...when the men came out of the fire...there was not even a singed hair!! Nothing was burned...oh but here's another cool thing...nothing was burned but the ropes that were binding them in the furnace!! The heat was in fact used to "FREE" them!! Trials, my friends, have purpose. The heat we feel today...just watch, God will use for His purpose. We will not be burned...as long as we continue to trust in God, speak His name, and follow in obedience to what He is calling us to do.

So?? Want the rest of the story?? Though it wasn't immediate...King N did open his eyes. Actually, he says it best: "At the end of that time, I, Nebuchadnezzar, raised my eyes toward heaven, and my sanity was restored. Then I praised the Most High; I honored and glorified him who lives forever" (Daniel 4: 34).

This is a Fiery Furnace in history...but fear not, the Lord will have His way.
Though the stakes are high and the fire is seven times hotter,
The Lord stands with us.
Only the ropes that bind us will burn, and there will be freedom for us who continue to live for HIM!
And when it is all said and done...the world, our leaders, and all who do not believe...Christ will make Himself known to them.
When that time comes, I pray that our leaders will fall on their faces and confess our Lord and Savior their MOST HIGH!!

Yes, history will be made.
Change is coming all right...you can bet on that.
I'm willing to bank it won't be the change "they" were thinking!!

When there are no words

This past weekend a friend of mine (Lori) received some devastating news. Her sister had a tragic skydiving accident and was severely injured. She has now gone home to be with her Savior. And so today there is a husband and 2 young daughters (as well as parents, sisters and extended family) who are left to wrestle with this enormous loss.

As my heart has been burdened for Lori and her family...this video seemed to be the only thing that made sense. When there are no words...just love on them as Jesus does and stay by their side!

We often feel the need to come up with something profound...something that will make the hurt and pain better. We do so because we desperately want to help, we struggle with seeing loved ones in agonizing pain. But most of the time...there is nothing we can say to lessen the pain. That is Gods job, only His power can do so.

But we can do something very significant...we can be willing to walk along side of them, loving them through the emotions and grief!

I'll stop now...this video/song says it better than I can.............

(you will need to pause the blog site music in order to hear this video!)

May you pray for this family as they walk through these days. I know they would covet your prayers. My prayer is that they feel God's presence like nothing they have ever experienced before!

no title...just sweet Maddie pictures...again!!

I'm just loving this child...I wish I could find words for how much I am enjoying being a mother to a daughter. Please don't misunderstand...I love being a mother to my sons too...very much so! I find incredible joy in being chosen as their mother. And even though the little boys are very challenging at this particular time, I love it still! There is just something unusual...maybe different, with Madelyn. Not better...just different than I have experienced with the boys. I'm giddy about her bouncing curls as she prances around the house. I watch her sleep and fight the urge to climb into her crib...only for the purpose of getting to snuggle with her cheeks once more!

"Prince Charming" (aka Andre) thought we were looking so very nice in our outfits this morning...so he took our pictures!!

This was me, yesterday afternoon as I was heading out to begin the journey of 14 miles!! I'm getting somewhat tired of planning my route to bring me by the house for food/water, etc. So, I got this pack that has water bottles and a large pocket for food/phone and such. I think I ate my way through the first 10 miles (Andre watched as I packed my pack and wanted to know if he could come...only b/c he was eyeing my food!!). The last mile was interesting (downright painful...but my own fault...explain another time...lesson learned!) however, the first 13 were really pleasant and smooth! There were a few moments here and there when my knees were giving me their opinions of this training program...and another time when my hip flexors wanted to give a "shout out" to anyone who would listen! No one did. Though I'm tired and sore today...I still feel it was a success!! The sun burn?? Um well...not too smart on my part!! It's making me the most uncomfortable today!!

If you haven't checked this blog in awhile...I have pictures of Halloween posted on the previous posting!! (for my family that maybe is behind)

Some costume fun!!

Here's the crew...looking ever so stunning and ready for a fun night at our church's fall festival!!

Dakota was original...a "skateboarder" (without the skateboard...I refused to carry it for him!) Still, he looks handsome!!

Ramiro is a "knight"...he isn't sure what that is...but he thought it surely was something that would require a mean face!!

Andre is "prince charming"...and that he is!! Complete with his princes (Madelyn)...

...and that she was!!

I was completely impressed with her willingness to walk around in her full "princess" attire!! (Thanks Sylva!!) Madelyn knew she was cute...and had a wonderful time in her outfit!!




The princess and her Papi!!

This picture was when we first got her all dressed...she was all smiles!!

Boys/men...take note! We. Want. To. Feel. Like. Princess.!!!

It starts at 1 and for some of us...never ends!!

Here's Madelyn earlier in the day...sporting her Halloween spirit!! I'm getting better at hair...so I just had to show you!!